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Disarm your insecurity alarm

We have all experienced times of insecurity; that creeping feeling of doubt in certain areas of our lives.  But when that unsafe feeling rules our life and keeps us from our gifts and from our best self, well it is like someone set off our insecurity alarm. It screams to us in any number of ways; retreat, arm yourself, don your shield and sometimes it tells us to attack .

If you are old enough to remember the television show  “Lost in Space” the robot would always warn Dr. Smith and the others by repeating in his robot voice “warning, warning, danger, danger”. Does your internal insecurity alarm do this?

In order to understand insecurity versus security it is important to learn the distinction between the two. Merriam Webster defines being secure as: freedom from danger, freedom from fear or anxiety; you can check for yourself here .  and Merriam Webster defines insecurity to mean; feeling deficient, not adequately guarded, not firmly fastened, or on shaky ground. Lets take the word insecure one step further and break up the word insecurity by defining the word “in”. What “in ” means is: in possession of, within.  These definitions are important because  what the word is telling us is that  insecurity is found only from within.  No thing , no person, no place or circumstance is responsible for our insecurity or security.  That is a great thing to know because it would be next to impossible  to change  our situations or people so we can be suitably secure and safe.

Start with 5 “in” questions when your insecurity alarm rings

  • What is it about this person, this situation or this set of circumstances that make me feel inferior?
  • Is it possible to feel inferior?
  • What would it take for me to feel safer or surer of myself? What would I need?
  • How is my current situation, current safety with people, or current circumstance reflective of my past?
  • In the present moment, in this present circumstance, with these people, how am I unsafe?

The more you can be aware and conscious of when your insecurity alarm is screaming the quicker you can calm it down by asking yourself a few questions. The more you practice the easier it will become. I also recommend in any insecure situation a simple affirmation repeating for four minutes  “I am safe” either just before you enter into the situation you are feeling insecure about and/ or every day until you reprogram the thoughts that created the unsafe feelings to begin with. If you are still having difficulty you may have to revisit some areas in your past in order to get clear of the belief that you are anything but magnificent. You may also need to forgive all situations that created this unsafe feeling, all people associated with making you feel less than secure. It is time to let that belief go, it isn’t serving you well.

I am really excited about my book Rewind, Rewriting your life script, currently in the editing phase. I discuss the insecurities I had  in just the process of writing the book and the steps I took to overcome that. Rewind is an abstract autobiography of my life looking at all the ill serving learned beliefs and how I got past them. I am really excited to share my journey with all of you very soon.

If you enjoyed this post, I would love your comments. If you have some additional advice to share I would appreciate leaving your wisdom on the topic of insecurity in the comment area. I will respond to all posts and questions. I have a few opening right now for new clients. To test the coaching process and to find out if it is indeed for you, I invite you to experience a no-strings attached complimentary coaching session of one hour in length . You can inquire about scheduling this call by visiting the contact page by clicking here.

2 Responses to Disarm your insecurity alarm

  • Mary Balmes says:

    Awesome Sue, I love it, especially the part “insecurity is found only from within”…. I believe everything starts with us and ends with us… and this statement says it all… I like the questions too, helps us all to monitor our own conscience and sub conscience, thank you :~)

  • suebirkam says:

    Thank you Mary for your comment. You are right , monitoring our thoughts and where they take us is key. When we ask the tough questions the answers are within.

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